Essay Review Guide

I’ve had a few morning thoughts as I’ve read through a number of essays this morning, and I thought it might help some of you if I shared.

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Here’s what I’m loving so far:

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1. a playfulness with language — not so much that I have to figure out what is being said, but enough to make what the intent behind the words is even deeper

2. a sense that the writer is having fun

3. sincerity — I love it when I can feel and hear the writer’s voice and it’s not being hidden behind a barrier of overwrought words and syntax

4. a good story that demonstrates a belief or value you have and then digs in way deeper with your commentary about how the anecdote or narrative affects you

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Here’s what I’m not liking, in fact sometimes I’m not even reading the full essay bc I’m finding it too boring to get to the end:

 

1. so many adverbs... to me they drag a story down

2. complicated syntax that is clearly not comfortable for you. Sometimes complicated syntax works and that’s cool; it’s all about your comfort level and how you approach it

3. thesaurus words. Don’t sound like you’ve swallowed a thesaurus. It’s off-putting to read when it sounds like someone is choking. Just say no to your thesaurus!! Both thesaurus words and overly complicated syntax can create a wall between you and your reader.

4. a rehash of your activities list and honors; I’m gonna learn about those in the application — this is your only chance to really connect with your reader. Don’t blow it.

5. too much narrative — not enough commentary. Look, I know you hear again and again to “show not tell” and I even occasionally give that advice and it’s good advice to a certain extent — but sometimes you just gotta tell me what you’re feeling and thinking. I want to know about what’s going on inside that amazing teenaged brain of yours.